“If you can’t change something and you have to experience it anyway then it is. Why worry about it or try to change it if it is going to happen anyway. What matters is what you’re gonna do with it. It is what it is.” – Tim Davidson 

I get in these ruts… well I call them ruts but honestly they are more like trenches. I find myself laying in them, wallowing around in self-pity, worrying about my future, thinking about the past, crying over moments lost, and allowing myself to be consumed by anxiety and all of these emotions. Then I feel guilty for thinking all of this and feeling this way. I feel so guilty and think what the heck am I doing feeling like this?

A good friend reminded me today that I’m human, life is messy, and it is okay to feel this way and have these moments. This is astonishingly true. The reality is that instead of life handing us hard things to handle, sometimes it chucks them at us and shows no mercy. These are the moments when we learn what we are capable of…

These are moments that push us and grow us. These are the moments we can look back on and think “If I made it through that then I can make it through anything”. These are the moments that make us strong. These are the moments make us stronger than we ever imagined.

The moments when you allow yourself to be in the trench, paralyzed by fear, overwhelmed with sadness, and consumed by emotions are when you realize what you are truly made of.  The moments when you allow yourself to be a disaster and admit your weaknesses only to pull yourself out. Those moments build strength, bravery, and courage. Those moments help you remember all you have done and all that you have become. You are strong and those moments make you even stronger.

So… Do it. Have your moment and allow yourself to lay down in the trench. Do it.

Cry, scream, yell, be worried, anxious, sad, scared, overwhelmed. Allow these emotions to consume you and know that it’s okay. Do you hear me…… It’s okay! Just remember that what you do next is what’s most important, pick up the pieces and get back out there. Use that moment to strengthen you and remind you what you are capable of

Then… Go for it. Whatever you need to do to feel yourself again. Go for it.

Go for a run, pray, read, meditate, work out, have dinner with a friend, bake cupcakes, binge watch Netflix, get a tattoo, travel, go to a concert, pierce your ears, set goals and crush them, forgive yourself, forgive others, allow yourself to feel, allow yourself to be you again.

Remember that no matter what life chucks at you and what little mercy you see. This life and the people in it cannot break you and it cannot stop you. Have your trench moments and remember that there is only one you. You are strong, brave, unbreakable and unstoppable.